Ramble Like Vince Vaughn

So I hear Vince Vaughn has several mean rambles in 'Wedding Crashers'. Drew recently played a drinking game that involved drinking whenever he rambled (among other things), and got rather drunk. I wish I was there, because it sounded like a fun time. However twas not to be, as I was in Christchurch. Earthquake City, and all that.
Poor bastards. The earthquakes that happened whilst I was up there freaked me out, but those ol' cantabs didn't even notice them. Amazing.

Anway

As usual I was having trouble coming up with a 'subject' so I thought I'd jut write and see where the blog took me. A 'ramble', if you will. There are a few things I would like to tell you about, and I'm going to, and you can't stop me.

Brass Monkey Rally '11 was a pretty sweet shindig. Apart from a slight mishap where my brother crashed his bike on the way up (hes ok though), it went off without a hitch. Well, there were a few hitches. We screwed up a few of the covers we hadn't learnt properly, but we were better than some bands I've seen. Not all bands, but some.
Twas a mild night as well, which definitely helped as usually theres snow/frost on the ground at the Rally so we were very lucky as it barely went past 0 degrees the whole night. Tropical.
And it was the very first gig I've ever played where I didn't put more makeup on. Amazing. Well, I figured since the general crowd looked a little like this:

I didn't really need to get dolled up in my usual fashion to fit in.
When we were setting up, we were getting a few odd look from the crowd standing around the massive bonfire. As Ian (sound-man-extraordinaire), put it,we were made up of a short guy, a cripple, a girl, and 'I don't even know whats going on with you'-guy. So of course the ol' bikers would be feeling a little bit of trepidation when I lugged my kick drum onto the stage (back-of-truck).

Nevertheless, we played an intense 5 and a half hours (with substantial breaks for Drew to rest his leg), to a very appreciative crowd. Money was thrown at us to play longer and longer, and I couldn't walk on my kick-drum foot for about a week afterwards.
Now that's a good gig.
So this wasn't really much of a ramble, but I promise I'll do better next time.
Here some pics of Brass Monkey Rally 2011 :)

Mean Massive Bonfire, this pic doesn't really do it justice as those flames were the size of a two storey house

Stage + Random guy

Josh and Fender

Peter the Bass-Man

Drew + Drunken Crowd (this may have been during Stairway To Heaven)

Crowd

Stairway

Fuck Fuckidee Fuck: An Analysis

Just doing a little experiment to see if I get more views on this blog by having 'fuck' in the title. Sorry Mum, but I have to do it. I have to say it. Parents shield your eyes!

Swear words fucking rule. 

Sometimes you just have to drop an F Bomb or even the dreaded C word. Why, I myself uttered both of those colourful beauties today, and it was all very much worth it.
As I was at work, I said these two under my breath, but I was still swearing nonetheless. I felt like a cool kid. The 'F Bomb' can be used in almost every situation, as every type of word (adjective, noun etc) as seen in this video

Even the C Word has it's uses. It's especially cool when a feminist reclaims the word for her own, much like African Americans have reclaimed the 'N Word'. I use the C word when I am most pissed at the world, and it makes me feel better. Or when I stub my little toe. That shit hurts.

Sometimes you have to say the C Word

Now I'm not a language expert. I do not claim to know the origins of all these amazing words that colour our everyday speech. But I have to say that swearing makes life interesting. You can even swear without actually swearing. Because a swear word is just an exclamation. Like 'Golly Gosh!' or 'Cripes!'. I knew a girl once who said 'Flip!' instead of fuck. It was pretty cute. So why in fact is 'Flip' better than 'Fuck'. Who even decided which one was to be the swear word? I couldn't find the answer to this on Wikipedia, so I'm stumped. The probable reason is that the most common definition of 'fuck' is to have sexual intercourse.
And the definition of 'flip' is:

flip

adjective /flip/  Glib; flippant - he couldn't get away with flip, funny conversation exclamation /flip/  Used to express mild annoyance <<< verb /flip/  flipped, past participle; flipped, past tense; flipping, present participle; flips, 3rd person singular present Turn over or cause to turn over with a sudden sharp movement - the yacht was flipped by a huge wave - the plane flipped over and then exploded Move, push, or throw (something) with a sudden sharp movement - she flipped off her dark glasses - she flipped a few coins on to the bar Turn (an electrical appliance or switch) on or off - he flipped a switch and the front door opened Toss (a coin) to decide an issue - given those odds, one may as well flip a coin - you want to flip for it? Buy and sell (something, esp. real estate or shares) quickly to make a profit - within one week of starting I flipped a property for a quick $3,000 profit Access the nonpublic parts of (a website) - if you want to learn who the main IT contact at a company is, just flip their Web site Suddenly become deranged or very angry - he had clearly flipped under the pressure Suddenly become very enthusiastic - I walked into a store, saw it on the wall, and just flipped noun /flip/  flips, plural A sudden sharp movement - the fish made little leaps and flips A quick look or search through a volume or a collection of papers - a quick flip through my cookbooks A quick tour or pleasure trip - I did a flip round the post-show party < This one is my favourite, I'm going to bring that shit into vogue.

Which isn't very profane at all, to be honest.It's use as an exclamation 'to express mild annoyance' doesn't really stand up to the word fuck. So basically, very prudish people who are adverse to discussing the human need to copulate decided to make 'fuck' a profane word and censor it to death.

But some people manage to slip by the radar. Like French Connection (fcuk), who used the profanity to successfully market themselves (even though they say it's the initials for French Connection United Kingdom).

Also (although this one isn't as great) Britney Spears 'If You Seek Amy'. This is almost clever, but not exactly.
If the lyrics made sense with the clever way the title sounds like 'F.U.C.K me', this song would be brilliant. But the line before says 'All of the boys and all of the girls are begging to', which is just plain obvious what Britney really means.

One day I'm going to come up with something better than that, and I will post a blog as soon as I do.

Just For You.
xxx

Teaser: Drew and Crowd at Brass Monkey Rally 2011. Stay Tuned.

The Battle Has Ended

So we went, we played, we almost conquered. Well, if we're pretending it was a real battle we would be lying on the ground groaning about the make-believe wounds in our side and dying a dramatic death. But we had fun along the way, and that's what's important.
Well, that's what my Mum would say.

She's a pretty cool Mum

In case you didn't get the reference, Honeybone played at OUSA's Battle Of The Bands Finals on Saturday night. We didn't get placed, which isn't suprising. Honeybone has never been a winner of such competitions. This was the first year we made it into the finals, so we were grateful just for that.

And the finals were an AWESOME night.
We played our new song, which doesn't have a name, so at the moment we're calling it 'progified eipic wonderness'. Well that's what I just called it then. But maybe that'll catch on. Anyway, that song goes for 9-11 minutes, depending on how wanky and long we want our guitar solos to be. It's such a beautiful song though, and has some pretty wicked time signatures in it, I feel like I finally deserve to call myself an Honours music student.

Everyone seemed to enjoy our 15 minute slot, and I got some pretty sweet compliments afterward too. Josh even found some groupies who pashed his guitar.

Our fans do this all the time

Our mates Kitten Suprise, Not For You and Black Sky Hustler all played amazingly. Black Sky Hustler earned a well deserved third placing, with Ignite The Helix coming in 2nd, which was suprising as I was sure they'd take out the 1st place.Who got first I hear you ask? Affco, a thrown together jam band made up of current and ex employees of the Rock Shop. They were pretty good, but probably didn't need to win any of the prizes, so I was a little confused. But sometimes things happen that make you go WTF. And thats ok.

Because sometimes life hands you lemons. And all you can say is 'Fuck the lemons and Bail'.